To Find Love..



It happened when we were in high school. It was 14th February and all my six friends joined our family for a Valentine’s Day dinner. Yes, people.My parents loved celebrating the day with people they adored and that list included my brother, his school friends, my school friends, their parents [if they wanted to skip, that was okay too! But mostly they loved sending their kids to the party.], and me.

I remember, we watched one late ninety’s popular movie, we ate everything that my mom cooked, we finished the cake that my dad ordered for us and said “Happy Valentine’s Day” to each other.

“If you host this party every year, we’ll never need a Valentine.” one of my friends happily emphasized.

“Oh! Please! But if you find one, please let us know first. We’ll celebrate that too. It is fun watching you all growing up so fast.” My mom laughed.

Everyone looked at me and grinned.

After dinner, we went to the patio and started discussing all irrelevant things that seemed prevalent that time. Boyfriends and love, was one of them.

At teen-age, life didn’t appear like a puzzle. We had answers to all questions, without the markings of right and wrong.

Two of my friends did not want boyfriends or even life-partners.

One friend really wanted to get married as early as possible, as she thought” Marriage means freedom. We can follow our dreams and no one will ever stop us. We can live the way we want to. Marriage will solve all problems.”

Other two friends shared the plan of doing research on robotics and computer applications and stated, “Love cannot be planned.”

My best friend S, all of a sudden, said to me “Let me know what kind of boyfriend you want. You write down because you express better when you write. I will follow that list. I am sure, your boyfriend will be a clone of your dad. Can you please make a list, a check list for me too?”

“Like, what I want to see in a future boyfriend?” I gave them a perplexed look.

All six friends agreed “Yes, Yes. That’s a good idea. We all can follow that list.”

When the clock hit 2 and everyone was fast asleep, I went to my study table and made a list. It took one hour though!

I named it: To find the future boyfriend and underlined, twice and thrice, and wrote:

  • Be so successful that a successful guy finds you easily.
  • Have a good heart so that no one can hurt your heart.
  • Be compassionate, nothing makes you more beautiful.
  • See good in others. That’s the best strainer.
  • Chase your dreams. Maybe you’ll find a companion during that journey.

I slept after writing those five points, because it was late, and I could not think of anything more logical. I did not include happiness, worries because that time happiness was free of cost and worries, extinct.

Next morning, I shared that page with all six friends and they somehow liked it; the one who thought “marriage solves all” found my five points very attractive. But S expressed, “This list proves, you can be so selfish. It’s all about you. Nothing is written about the guy you’ll like.”


Half a decade later, while discussing with my brother about his friends’ high school romance, I came to know that he read five wonderful points about “how to be a good boyfriend and how to find love” in my diary and planned to follow them.

“That list is darn good and full of wisdom.It has such a strong message to all of us.”

“Why did you read my diary?” I was annoyed.

“That page was open.” he answered,” and I value good suggestions, especially from my sister.”

Now how a page of 15th February was left open, that answer I will never find! But I know that siblings are the best gifts to us; especially those siblings who value elder sister’s random opinions and teen-age wisdom!


Have you ever made a list to find love? Do you laugh at your teen-age wisdom? Do you celebrate Valentine’s Day?


Author: Archita

Musings about life and photography.

26 thoughts on “To Find Love..”

  1. It makes me very happy and content when you say that. 🙂 Thank you, Indira, for your words and readership. 🙂 Very happy to meet you here almost a year ago.:) Love and hugs to you too. Thank you for being there. 🙂

  2. The more I read your posts, the more I become fan of your writing and you. It seems you were wise enough from your teenage. Love and hugs and lots of blessings.

  3. Apologize for late response.
    Yes,I love that memory- my parents happily celebrating that day with all of us.
    For couples though, every day is made of love and other things. 🙂

    That list is kind of teenage-ish even though it feels great to know that my brother finds it important and wise. 🙂 I didn’t follow that list or any list even though I do make lots of lists, most of them are for groceries and “To do” ones for work .:D

  4. We don’t really celebrate Valentine’s Day, we do for the kids though. My Father always gave me a single rose for every Valentine’s Day, even now he does. He did that because he knew I wouldn’t always have someone else to show they loved me on that day and he never wanted me to feel sad about it, so I do the same with my kids 🙂 Between my husband and I, the single day just isn’t that important, it’s loving and working through the rest that we celebrate!

    I love that your parents had Valentine parties for you! And your list for love from a teenage perspective was great! I never made a list for love, through I made a list for “not” love while a teenager!

  5. Yeah! My parents are pretty adorable and they were my friends’ favorites! 🙂 Thank you for loving the list. I didn’t remember the list until it was mentioned to me again! 😀

  6. Life is peaceful, you know, when we are our own competition. I read your stories and I know how nicely you’re writing about your kids and your life with them. 🙂

  7. Ha ha..:) I did not follow that list, so I cannot assure that things will be right if you follow the list. But if I look back , I always loved planning about self-development; it was better than developing an imagery of a dream-boyfriend! 😀

  8. I am so happy to read this, TD. 🙂 You are right, love comes in all sort of variances. I forgot this list until it was mentioned again 6 years later. 🙂 Teenage wisdom- even I was not wise, I am still not wise..:D

  9. I somehow doubt anything I said as a teenager was wisdom. And I’ve never made a list for love. I don’t want to, either. Love comes in all sorts of variances, so I’d hate to turn love away if it didn’t meet my exclusive list.

  10. heehe!! Lovely memories on V Day and u have such adorable parents. Love ur beautiful and inspiring list. So, hows the husband..he fits the yardstick or u making him fit? lol

  11. Have you ever made a list to find love?
    Do you laugh at your teen-age wisdom?
    I am pretty proud of those wisdoms 😛
    Do you celebrate Valentine’s Day?

  12. I see so much love in this post – love of parents, friends,siblings. Truly magical. I loved how you ended this post, it didn’t feel like you’re forcing your opinion. Those five points are excellent.

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